Monday, May 29, 2017

KCK April PR - MLB to BSA counterparts

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New York Yankees:
Unarguably the most prestigious team in the MLB, maybe even in American sports.  Year in and year out, all they do is win- and not just in my lifetime.  They also seem to have an outsized impact on the league rules/management, have a literal Babe Ruth, a team name offensive to southerners, and just when you thought their reign was over, here comes Aaron Judge! 
BSA: Jersey Shore D-Bags
Babe Ruth = David Dodd
Lou Gehrig = Mike Bryant
Aaron Judge (as in successful youngster, not the dinger machine) = Richardo Gonzalez

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Colorado Rockies:
The Rockies are mostly known for playing in a bandbox a mile above sea level.  However, this year, they’re making some serious noise early in the season.   However, their hot start might be an illusion, probably more of a .500 team.  Also, when was the last time you heard from either of them?
Orlando Calrissian
Mark Reynolds!? = Rich Anderson
New Orleans Looters = L.A Dodgers

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San Francisco Giants:
The Giants probably had some good preseason press, but its 201so it never mattered.  Used to have the greatest player of all time Barry Bonds.  http://www.sbnation.com/2017/4/11/15264034/barry-bonds-2004-stats-chart-party  Also can’t hit for shit, relying entirely on pitching.  Will probably rebuild if things don’t work this year. 
Seattle Pikes
Barry Bonds = Albert Lebel
Kevin = Tim Lincecum

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Red Sox:
Great rookies, established vets, yet somehow underperforming this year.  Giant fan base, signs free agents, has a top 5 player in the league who is under 26… wait this one actually works!  Why, it’s our good friends in: 
SoCal Bruins
Mookie Betts/Andrew Benintendi/Xander Bogarts = Jeffrey King, Earl Wiggins

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Baltimore Orioles:
Listen, this list isn’t exhaustive, and some of these are going to be based more on recent history.  So here we have Baltimore, having stormed out to a .667 winning percentage with a run differential of just +13.  Unfortunately BSA isn’t far enough along to have someone outperform their base stats by so much yet.  So let’s just say:
BSA: Kansas City Kings (2027 version)
Loves dingers = Loves dongers
Both currently stuck in the rain in D.C

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Houston Astros:
Houston has really gotten very good recently, and boast some great team friendly contracts with young talent.  They seem to have their division sewn up already, and a cunning front office.  Plus, Jose Altuve is fantastic, yet still underrated in the mainstream media (SAD!)  Just pretend that Mike Trout is on their team too.
Springfield Stars
Shane Hutchinson = Carlos Correa
David Davidson = Mike Trout

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Cleveland Indians:
Went to the World Series last year, great manager, everyone loves them, expert bullpen use, offensive logo… ok, only the last one really works. 
Fresno but not really. 
Pepe = Chief Wahoo


If people like attempt, I'll try to do some more next month!

So Cal April PR - Team Stats

Through one month of baseball, team statistics can be very surprising and whacky. Some statistics will stay consistent throughout the season, but some will not. It is up to you to decide whether or not the stats are telling the truth or if they are spreading fake news.

Sorry the formatting is so poop.

Standings:

          Top 3:

Greenville: 17-6
Fresno: 17-7
Irvine: 16-8
Jersey Shore: 16-8

          Bottom 3:

Austin River: 7-17
St. Charles: 8-17
Niagara Falls: 8-17

Runs Scored:

Top 3:

So Cal: 159
Boston: 150
Beech Mountain: 146

          Bottom 3:

Seattle: 71
Plymouth: 78
St. Charles: 82

Home Runs:

Top 3:

Greenville: 45
So Cal: 44
Pocatello: 43

          Bottom 3:

Seattle: 13
San Francisco: 15
St. Charles: 15

Stolen Bases:

          Top 3:

Springfield: 28
Seattle: 27
Jersey Shore: 23
New York: 23

          Bottom 3:

Houston: 2
St. Charles: 6             
Nashville: 6

OPS:

          Top 3:

Greenville: .895
So Cal: .885
Fresno: .834

          Bottom 3:

Seattle: .620
San Francisco: .643
Chicago: .645

Runs Against:

          Top 3:

                    Plymouth: 67
                    Springfield: 67
                    Jersey Shore: 71

          Bottom 3:

                    Boston: 185
                    Beech Mountain: 151
                    Maui: 145

Starter ERA:

          Top 3:                    

                    Plymouth: 2.50
                    Springfield: 2.56
                    Jersey Shore: 2.94

          Bottom 3:

                    Austin River: 6.73
                    Boston: 6.13
                    Maui: 6.12

Bullpen ERA:

          Top 3:

                    Irvine: 2.38
                    Springfield: 2.41
                    Jersey Shore: 2.49

          Bottom 3:

                    Boston: 9.94
                    Beech Mountain: 8.56
                    Pocatello: 6.25

Strikeouts:

          Top 3:

                    New Orleans: 225
                    St. Louis: 214
                    Baffin Island: 206

          Bottom 3:

                    San Francisco: 120
                    Chicago: 139
                    Boston: 139
                    El Dorado: 139

Defensive Efficiency:

          Top 3:

                    Plymouth: .729
                    Vista: .727
                    Kansas City: .725

          Bottom 3:

                    Boston: .620
                    So Cal: .638
                    Pocatello: .638

Fielding Percentage:

          Top 3:

                    Kansas City: .992
                    Seattle: .991
                    Jersey Shore: .991

          Bottom 3:

                    Pocatello: .972
                    St. Charles: .978
                    El Dorado: .978

Jersey Shore April PR. One of the Good Guys; D-Bags to Retire Bryant's 42

Noticeably absent from the current year's Jersey Shore team is the smiling face of 2 time MVP Mike Bryant who retired this past off-season.  Bryant spent his entire career with Jersey Shore after becoming their 1st amateur draft pick at 21st overall in the 2010 season.  The slugger played in the World Series 3 times, was only the 2nd player in BSA history to win the Triple Crown and finishes his career in the Top 10 of most offensive categories.  On Friday, May 26th when the D-Bags take on rival Greenville, the number 42 will be hoisted into the Jersey Shore ring of honor.

Bryant grew up in Beach Haven West, New Jersey, just 50 miles where the future franchise of the Jersey Shore D-Bags would play their home games.  A natural athlete, Bryant would excel in baseball and football as well as academics in High School.  A heavily sought after recruit, Bryant would decide to go cross country for college and attend the prestigious Stanford University.  Bryant would drop football to put his full attention on baseball and it would show.  He would start from Day 1 and man 2nd base for all 4 seasons playing for the Cardinal.  In 187 college games, Bryant would slash .328/.389/.613 while hitting 53 HR, knocking in 154 runs and scoring 153 times.  

Twenty teams would pass on Bryant before Jersey Shore would select him with 21st overall pick.  Bryant would sign right away and spend 3 years between AA Gainsville and AAA Tuscaloosa before making his major league debut in June 2013.  He would take over at 2B and not look back for the next 13 seasons.  During those 13 seasons, he would have a 10 year streak of 35+ home runs and 100+ RBI.  He would win the CL MVP in 2016 and 2017, and have only the 2nd Triple Crown season in BSA history in 2016 where he would hit .347 with 40 HR and 158 RBI.  He would lead Jersey Shore to their 1st playoff appearance and 1st World Series appearance in 2015 where the D-Bags would fall in 7 games to Hendersonville.

Bryant's number will be the 1st number to be retired by the Jersey Shore franchise.  The first 20,000 fans to the game will receive a commemorative pin and Mike Bryant bobble-head.  Several former D-Bags will be in attendance and will be signing autographs before and after the game.

Irvine April PR - Update of Rule V Draft Selections in Draft Order (In summary, where players become ghosts!)

ROUND ONE:

Raul Bruno: SF drafted him first in the draft. Currently playing a utility IF role as a defensive minded SS. Hitting. .188 in 17 plate appearances with a -0.1 WAR.

Billy Campbell: Selected by Austin he was returned to Houston and is playing in the minors.

Sixto Perez: Selected by Boston, he has hit .417 in 13 plate appearances for a 0.2 WAR. For what its worth, Sixto has a 3.41 catcher ERA so he’s not been involved in the Boston Massacres.

Troy Parker: Selected by Beech Mountain, he’s appeared in 7 games (2 starts) with a 6.00 ERA due to giving up 6 homeruns and more hits than innings pitched and has a -0.1 WAR.

Tanyu Imai: Selected by Chicago, he’s had 19 plate appearances batting .188 with a -0.1 WAR.

Reynoldo Slomp: Selected by Maui, he’s been somewhat productive hitting .333 in 19 at bats and filling the role of a utility infielder with a 0.1 WAR.

Pedro Santiago: Selected by St. Charles, he’s appeared in 6 games as a reliever and has pitched just over 11 forgettable innings. However his last 7 innings in relief against Chicago and Greenville has been solid and he’s cut his ERA down from 19.64 to 6.35 with a -0.1 WAR.

Milton Watson: Selected by Nevada, Milton has been a productive force in his 34 plate appearances in April hitting .355 and earning a 0.2 WAR rating to date.

Bill Sampson: Selected by Nassau, Sampson has been downright ugly in April out of the bullpen with a 12.50 ERA. However, as a 25 year old, he shows some promise with his strikeout rate and 0.2 WAR. Just don’t ask him to pitch against Orlando again where he gave up 5 runs in 1/3 of an inning!

Mike Meeks: Did not make it out of Spring Training with Vista and was returned to the Browns.

Jim Daniel: Selected by Houston, he’s nothing special out of the pen with a 6.75 ERA in 6.2 innings pitched with little ability to strike people out demonstrated thus far with his -0.1 WAR.  He’s also 30 years old.

Dave Riley: Selected by KC, he is apparently a ghost as he’s not been returned but is not showing on the KC roster.

Leon Hernandez: Selected by the Browns, he’s become a ghost as well.

Barry Garner: Selected by NJ from Maui, this 24 year old already has 2 saves in 3 appearances and has been the Wild Thing out there with 6 walks and 12 K’s in 6 innings pitched. 0.0 WAR.

Alberto Campos: Selected by Fresno, he’s now a ghost.

Alfredo Montalvo: Selected by Irvine, 25 year old Alfredo has earned a spot in the rotation as he shut down Boston’s offense and scattered Maui’s potent offense. In 22 innings pitched, he’s 1-2, 3.27 ERA, 5 appearances with two starts, 1.09 WHIP, 6.5 K’s/9, 1.2 BB/9, and a 0.2 WAR. Icing on the top of the cake is that he was stolen from Southern Cal, Irvine’s top rival in the division.

Halewign Tipping: Selected by POC, he’s been a disaster in his 15.1 innings pitched with an ERA just under 10.00, 10 walks, only 3 K’s, and a -0.4 WAR. He’s only 24 so perhaps he’ll figure out how to pitch yet…but I would hide him in the bullpen and spot start him.

Ken Longoria: Selected by Baffin, he’s now a ghost.

Raymond Ritchie: Selected by Seattle, he’s a ghost.

Shawn Gutierrez: Drafted by Greenville but returned to sender.

Gilberto Silva: FINE PLYMOUTH; HE’S CHEATING!!! Not sure how, but Gilberto is now playing for Plymouth’s AA affiliate instead of being returned to Southern Cal’s minor league system. No record of any transactions in Gilberto’s history.

ROUND TWO:

Pedro Mendoza: Selected by Chicago, he’s pitched decently out of the bullpen although recent trends are not very encouraging as he’s given up 4 runs in 4.1 innings the last two games. In 9 appearances, he’s pitched 12 innings, with a 4.50 ERA and a 0.1 WAR.

Ryobe Yamamoto: Cleverly done by STL to take 6.8 million off the books! Maui selected Ryobe and has paid him the big bucks to start one game where he hit .500 and has walked once. In that one game and one other plate appearance, he’s earned a 0.1 WAR! Perhaps he would have more stats, but he got hurt and is currently on the disabled list.

Kyle Harrison: Despite being disparaged by IRV GM Rice, Harrison continues to play pretty well at the BSA level considering he’s never been above A level ball before. The fact that he’s the starting SS for St. Charles is a bit shocking – he’s not exactly a defensive wizard there and has already committed 5 errors and has a -0.7 zone rating. Offensively, he’s hit .278 in 80 plate appearances, walking 6 times while striking out 22 times. He’s hit 1 double, 2 triples, and 1 home run scoring 11 runs on the season while batting in 3. He’s only at 0.1 WAR but is on pace for a 1.0 WAR.

Cliff Long: Selected by Nevada, Cliff has been a decent #5 starter in their 6 man rotation. On the season, he’s started 4 games, has a 4.98 ERA that was much lower before two recent poor outings where he gave up 5 runs to both SNF and NFF (really, those teams?)  averaging 7.1 Ks/9 for a 0.4 WAR and a 2-0 record.

Alberto Chavez: Selected by Fresno, he’s a ghost!

Ron Edwards: Baffin took Edwards and he’s seen 24 plate appearances and 4 starts thus far at first base. He’s currently hitting .261 with 3 doubles for a 0.1 WAR.

Jesus Martinez: Selected by Seattle, he’s been a solid situational pitcher out of the pen although his auxiliary stats seem to indicate he relies on his fielders with only 2.5K/9 (but he doesn’t walk people at all!). He’s currently sporting a 2.45 ERA. While he’s seen action in 9 games, he’s clearly a situational lefty as he’s only pitched 3.2 innings for a -0.1 WAR.

Dan Hooper: Selected by Greenville, Dan has played quite a few games after coming up from AA ball from Irvine’s organization as he’s played in 14 games in April seeing the plate 57 times where he’s hit .245, 2 homers, scored 5 runs, batted in 6 and sports a -0.3 WAR while learning CF on the fly in the pros (So far, this experiment has not gone splendidly with 3 errors in 12 games and a -4.3 zone rating. He’s a wiz in LF defensively but for some reason that’s not where he’s playing. I’d be playing Rosas in CF but I’m sure Greenville’s GM has a plan?

Alejandro Ramos: Selected by Plymouth, he’s a ghost!

ROUND THREE:

Juan Gonzalez: Selected by Maui, this 31 year old has pitched just fine out of the bullpen as he sports a 4.66 ERA (decent in Maui!), 2-1 record with 1 save, and almost 10 innings pitched. The fact that he’s walked 7 batters in those 10 innings might be a bit disconcerting however but at the moment he sports a 0.0 WAR.

Bill Hines: This 25 year old was selected by St. Charles and has also been thrown into the fire as a starter. In four games started, this pitcher has a 6.23 ERA, 22 innings pitched, given up 5 homers, walked 11 while striking out 18 for a -0.2 WAR. Interestingly, KCK kicked his butt in his final start of spring training beating him 14-5 (although he actually pitched okay in his 4 innings of work) and then welcomed him officially to the Pros by beating him 14-5 once again (this time he sucked as he gave up 7 runs in 3.1 innings pitched).

Carl Willis: Selected by Nevada, he was returned to Nashville before the start of the season.

Jaime Rodriguez: Selected by Fresno, he’s a ghost!

ROUND FOUR:

Alejandro Longoria: Selected by St. Charles to serve as the long man out of the pen. He sucks. I mean, nobody cares since he’s pitched in games the team has lost by 6,7,9, and 10 runs. He sports a 7.27 ERA, 1.96 WHIP, 5/2 BB/9 but does show some ability with the K as he averages over 10K/9 which helps him gain a 0.2 WAR to date. He’s definitely been unlucky so far with his BABIP as its around .430.

Isaac Pope: He’s stuck around and pitched extremely well in Nevada with a 0.92 ERA in 19.2 innings which also includes 2 starts, 13 K’s, and a 0.6 WAR while earning 1 win and 2 saves. At only 24 years old, perhaps he can have a bit of a future in the BSA with his plus curveball and decent changeball.

Jerry Beck: The one man from this draft who isn’t a ghost in Fresno although perhaps he should be considering his 7.11 ERA in 4 appearances out of the pen where he’s given up 3 home runs in 6 innings of work and sports a -0.3 WAR.

ROUND FIVE:

Irwin Conway: This 24 year old has been serviceable out of the pen in his 8 innings of work in St. Charles earning 2 saves while striking out 4 for a 0.0 WAR.

Ken Burris: Selected by Nevada, he’s a ghost!

ROUND SIX:

Doug Brown: Selected by Nevada, he’s a ghost!

Nashville April PR: Minor Leagues Playing Major Chords

After many long hours and late nights, things are finally paying off for Nashville. When Team President Adam Brisske took his new position and assessed the organization top to bottom, he saw a situation that was worse than he could have imagined.

"There was a lot of promising talent here, in large part thanks to [scouting director] Pedro [Alvarez], but we felt that the development process needed to reworked. There was no real philosophy in place and we felt it was hurting our players and the organization overall."

Some players did not take this so well, as it saw many players being sent down to a lower league when previous management had made it clear they had deserved their call up.

"That was the hardest part, making those phone calls." Adam Brisske told reporters. "We just assured them that we are looking out for their best interests. We want them all to succeed and reach the major leagues. They had just been mismanaged and it wasn't anything that they had done. I think almost everyone is on board with the plan now knows what they need to show us to earn that promotion."

The results are showing. The AAA Louisville Bats are 20-6, the AA Casper Ghosts are 23-4 and the A Evanston Elitists are 16-11. All three ball clubs are leading their respective divisions.

The Nashville organization also announced their pitcher and batter of the month for each club.

AAA Louisville Bats
SP Jae-hyun Choe, 26:     5 GS, 4W-0L, 31 IP, 30 K/11 BB, 4.06 ERA
2B Jesus Cabrera, 21:      .398/.451/.574, 1 HR, 28 RBI, 13 SB

AA Casper Ghosts
SP Tony Henderson, 26:   5 GS, 2W-0L, 31.1 IP, 37 K/15 BB, 0.57 ERA
CF Ramon Morales, 20:    .381/.500/.546, 3 HR, 27 RBI, 12 SB

A Evanston Elitists
SP Jesus Sanchez, 22:    5 GS, 4W-0L, 30.1 IP, 36 K/5 BB, 2.67 ERA
1B Jacob Wilcox, 20:        .317/.389/.505, 3 HR, 20 RBI, 3 SB

New York Knights April PR

New York Knights Press Release:  30 April 2028

           
The Knights began 2028 as they have so many times, under .500 and with questions surrounding both the offense and pitching.  Star pitcher Hong-ryul Yun is sitting at 2 and 2 with an ERA of 5.97.  Dan Wilson’s ERA is just a bit lower at 5.76, the front office hopes that Yun and Wilson can correct their early struggles and history provides ample evidence that both should improve over the course of the season.
           
Management is not surprised with the anemic performance of the offense as little was done in the offseason to make up for the loss of both Donaldson and Blake.  Even the loss of the mediocre Yasuhiko Sumita went unaddressed.  The problems are scattered throughout the lineup, with the team OBP hovering around .310.  The Knights are pinning their hopes on Pepe Carrasco, Warren Potter, and Lonnie Anderson, the rest of the offense is a patchwork of mediocre players at best. 

The team was able to get ten million dollars for OF Gabriel Erwin in hopes of shoring up their money situation.  The Knights appear to be looking to the future and any on field success will be a pleasant surprise. 


Offensive stars:
Warren Potter .350/.357/.537
Lonnie Anderson .323/.369/.552
Pepe Carrasco .315/.387/.478

Pitching stars:
Thatcher Smith 2 wins 1 loss, 2.38 ERA.
Juan Ortiz 6/6 in save situations, 2.53 ERA.

Rookie:  CF Mike Harris .450 average, though only with 20 ABs.

Nassau April PR - Going International

Over the past several seasons, Nassau has been spending on pro international players, who have had their international stats erased by the magic of OOTP.  With only a scout view and shaky OSA to go on, there is not a small chance these guys don't pan out.  So let's check in on how these guys are doing...


In December 2027, the Rockets signed 28 yo closer Guan-Cai Yong from Taiwan to a 5 year deal worth up to $24.5M, and a month later in January, signed another 28 year old, OF Kenji Kudo from Japan to a 4 year, $21M contract.

The first month of the season is a time to over-react to small sample sizes, but the early results look promising.

Yong has already appeared in 10 of the 25 games this season, throwing 9.1 innings, and he's K'd 16 batters already for a ridiculous 48.5% K rate.  On top of that, he has yet to allow a single hit.  Small downside, he's walking 15% of hitters.  Yong spoke recently to the Nassau press through his interpreter, and despite his reputation for being a bit dull, was quoted as saying, "I'd love a shot at that punk from Vista, the one nobody else can seem to strike out.  I'm very disappointed we don't play those guys until later in the season."  His agent later claimed, unsurprisingly, that Yong was mis-quoted.

As for Kudo, Nassau fans have quickly taken a liking to him, and he's turned a few heads around the league, too.  Kudo took home the rookie of the month award for April in the NL.  He slashed 289/350/478, good for a 118 wRC+, and was solid in CF as well, credited with saving almost 2 runs already. 

In addition to Yong and Kudo, Ju-choer Yi is back in the bullpen this season.  He signed with Nassau before 2027 out of South Korea, and had a 4.10 ERA in 31 appearances before being sidelined with a finger injury for the second half of last season.  He's thrown 4.1 scoreless innings so far in 2028.

Lastly, there's Japanese C Shiro Ueno, who is 25 and signed a minor league deal before the current season.  He's currently playing with AAA Havana.  Ueno also had a good first month, posting a .921 OPS and throwing out 38.5% of runners.  Given the lack of production at C with the big-league club, it seems likely Ueno will have more than a cup of coffee in the bigs later this season.

Vista April PR #3 - Mailman Presents: Dante "I dare you to K me" Owens

Hello Everyone, 

My name is Randy Mailman.  Hope you are having a great day, and fuck the Seattle Pikes. You may have heard of me. I'm a pitcher for the Vista Panthers. I previously played for the New York Knights and made the BSA at the ripe age of 17.

I've been around the block in the BSA world. Even though I'm overweight and aging fast, I had my best BSA season ever last year. I came from the same as Dale Reese, except he's way richer than I am now and I'm the better player. Haha Dale, you suck. 

Anyways, I'm here to talk about a player I really like. He's new to our team and since he's still relatively young I haze the shit out of him. 

I'm Mailman, so I like to deliver. I throw shit at all of my teammates and I'm generally an annoying fuck to young players. Dante being no exception.

Except it doesn't fucking work. The little shit literally hits everything I throw at him. I thought he was only good at hitting baseballs but he literally hits everything. 

Throw some used condoms? He hits it back and it exploded in my face.

Throw twinkies? He hits it. And they some how magically stay fully intact until they hit me in the face. 

I've even thrown a pizza at Dante and he just hits it, stays all in one piece and lands in front of a homeless person about 440 feet away.

Look at this little asshole:
Dante Owens









Dante, wipe that "you can't haze me Mailman" grin off your face.

I guess I can't be too mad at Dante though since he's on my team and he's balling like he's Jim Jones.

49 ABs and dude hasn't struck out once. Hell, he's only had one 0-2 plate appearance.

Dante is the type of player that makes our GM wet, I know that much.

Anyways, I love you Dante. Keep Balling.

Sincerely,

Randy Mailman 

Randy Mailman